Your not so ordinary advice blog
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“I think fitting in is highly overrated. I’d rather just fit out... Fitting out means being who you are, even when people insist that you have to change. Fitting out means taking up space, not apologizing for yourself, and not agreeing with those who seek to label you with stereotypes.”― Golda Poretsky
We're just two teenagers trying to help.
We don't judge.
DISCLAIMER: We are not professionals. We use our past experiences as a means for giving advice and try our best to be unbiased.
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Ive liked someone for 2 years. I'm in his little brother's year (he's 2 years older than us)... this is quite complicated but I've missed so many chances with this guy. we're so compatible and used to share so many intense stares, we've spoken quite a few times but in the past few weeks, we've been having finals and shit and havent had any chances to talk.. plus he's graduating soon. I'm not sure if i even stand a chance. should i tell his brother? something idk (oh and his bro's mate likes me)
Well I believe that you should bring it up to his brother. Maybe he knows something that you don’t, you never know until you ask. Also, maybe you should bring it up to him, because if I was into a girl, I would let her know, just so that I don’t miss the chance. If he likes you, that’s great, but if he doesn’t, you have to understand that, he’s graduating and maybe that’s one of his reasons, but the point is, you never know until you try. You also got to look out, because you never know how he was looking at you, you don’t know if you’re someone that he likes, or one of his brothers friends, you have to be careful of the signs. Just bring it up, and see what happens after, and if you do, make you you let us know how it goes (:
Goodluck to you :D
- J
I've been thinking about suicide way too much in the last two months? How do I stop??
Talk to someone about it.
Let them know everything you’ve been feeling.
Why you want to kill yourself.
What you hate about life.
Why you’re sad.
ANYTHING. Just let it all out.
Find positive outlets for any negativity that has been on your mind lately.
Go for a walk- It gives you time to think about things and appreciate the world in a way.
Be productive- It really helps you feel better. I mean, I know cleaning or doing work isn’t the best while you’re doing it, but afterwards, you feel accomplished.
Cook- Find recipes online and make something new and interesting. Cook desserts or make an awesome sandwich. I actually just learned how to make French macarons. I’m not sure if you like those, but they’re pretty simple, to give you an idea. It doesn’t even matter if you’re a good chief or not. Just cook because it’s something to do. Plus you get food out of it. Win-Win.
Volunteer- Help out at animal shelters or go to your local Habitat for Humanity organization. Be a part of something that gives back & you’ll find that it’s a really amazing experience. I know it sounds cliche, but it’s really true.
Go to a crowded area and take random photos of different people- I know it’s mean or really weird, but it’s actually tons of fun. Just whip out that camera and take photos of people who don’t know it. I mean, don’t post it or anything, just appreciate the off guard expressions of those people you took photos of. Once in a while you’ll get a candid shot of someone picking their nose. lol
Jump on your bed- Jumping is just really fun. It doesn’t even matter what age you are.
ok, this one is ridiculous, but
Stand on a chair for 5 minutes- I know. This is dumb. But it’s actually pretty hilarious and laughter is a great thing to partake in.
Get a chair, bring it to your living room, your kitchen, even outside your house and just stand on it for 5 minutes.
Don’t move. You can’t even get down until the time is up. Just stand there.
SO,the logic behind this?
The reason being that you’re going to be too busy wondering why the fuck you’re standing on a chair that you won’t have any time to think about suicide.
Plus it takes a lot of discipline to train your mind into following this one through. Trust me. It works. & it’s funny.
And if none of these suits you, then just know that I am always here for you if you ever feel like you’re going over the edge. I apologize that this took so long to receive a reply, but I will make sure it won’t happen again.
You’re never alone, and I believe in your strength.
Goodluck, my beautiful human being! I love you.
-Via
i like this guy, and i have for a really long time. he knows it too, but he has a girlfriend. his girlfriend and i are good friends (theres no reason for me to dislike her) but his friend told me that he feels really bad about the whole situation (me). he's a really sweet and modest guy, and he would never do anything mean. i should stop liking him, right? i've liked him for so long and its hard... how do i stop liking him?
As much as it might hurt, it would be best to move on.
There’s no need to hurt both you and him over something that isn’t possible at the moment.
I mean, I know you don’t want to ruin anything between him and his girlfriend or your relationship with either of them.
Getting over someone is really hard. But you can ease the hurt or trouble by just submerging yourself with positive people and friends. Just get out and do things to take your mind off of everything.
I would also suggest SPACE! This is my biggest tip.
Stay away from him for a while. Don’t talk, don’t hang out, and just don’t communicate. At least for a while.
If that’s not possible, just keep interactions to a minimum.
Goodluck, my friend! You can do it!<3
-V
i want to be in a relationship so badly. it's crazy. i see them around me & everyones happy & cute. then i watch romantic comedies, or movies that just have a cute ending, even if it's stuff like iron man, how the couples end up, it's just adorable. i feel this weird pit in my stomach, and i really want that. i know i'm only 15 & i should be patient. but i don't know.. i'm bi, but i need someone. who's there for kisses & cuddles. and someone who's just there for me.
I really see where you’re coming from.
When I was much younger, I wanted the exact same thing.
& though I know that having someone there with you is really comforting, you really can’t rush these things.
Just take your time and gradually meet new people. Get to know them and develop a great friendship & Through that, the potential of finding someone for you increases.
However, you’re still young. You have tons of time to get to that point in life.
Goodluck, my friend:)
Love will find you!
-V
(1 of 2) Hi so I kind of need to vent and I don't know who to turn to so I hope it's okay if I vent here. So recently I've been seeing a therapist (3 times so far) and talking to them and doing all that stuff but it seems to be making things worse and I just feel more depressed and more discouraged and I don't know if that's normal. And I just feel like I'm a failure and I won't get anywhere in life and I won't live a great life and I don't know what to do with myself cause I'm having a really
Well I can’t say that I know exactly how you feel, but I’m pretty sure I can relate to it. Growing up, I’ve been confused, lost and depressed, but I always cover it up ya’know, but friends are a great support (the ones that you trust). I feel as if it would be a good thing to let them know, if they judge you, they’re not your fiends, the ones that will stick by your side and help you find the root of your problem are the true friends. If the therapist isn’t helping you, then try doing something else. Try new things, explore, live life, YOLO, maybe you don’t need help, or someone to tell you what’s with you, maybe you just need to discover yourself and get this depression off of your shoulders. You’re your own person and you know what works for you, so if it isn’t helping, discontinue it. There’s times where I felt content and happy, and I didn’t even need anyone there, I just needed to evaluate my life. You just need to fight these feeling and did the good in life, cuz there’s so many. We are always here for you, and so are your true friends and family. If you need anything else, we’re here for you (:
Goodluck and you can get through this :D
- J
I also wear cutoffs past the knees, it's just better that way. But anyways, thanks for the advice, and I do agree that conformity is a dangerous thing. It's just that not everyone I meet is as open-minded as you. I had the classic "whale tail" one time and I got quite the stink eye. So I dunno, I'll just keep at it and hope for the best.
I undoubtedly agree with you and Jayton.
Just be you and anyone else who judges that is no one you need to listen to.
The best is yet to come, you got this!
Goodluck, my friend:)
-V
To the dude asking about thongs. Sid Vicious wore thongs and he's pretty bad ass. Can't post the link but just youtube the video for Sid Vicious' "Something Else". It's all there. Haters gonna hate.
So, Im a guy and I've recently starting wearing mens thongs. I feel really comfortable and relaxed in them, especially when I don't have to talk to anybody, almost like I'm more approachable. But then when I go out or whatever and talking to people, I start feeling awkward and a bit embarrassed. I know I have no real reason to feel that way, I mean Im not gay or anything like that, its just...I dunno. Society is ruining it for me. Do you think it's weird or strange or whatever? What should I do?
You be you and be comfortable with what you like. People think I’m weird cuz I wear cutoffs past my knee, but I don’t care because I like it and it makes me feel comfortable. Society ruins a lot of things for people now adays, but it’s people like me and you and my amazing co advisor that have to stand up and just change what they think. You’re not weird, you’re an individual, and those are the people that we need. We don’t need to conform, we just need to be us. I’m not trying to preach but this is what I truly believe in. Wear your man thong and be proud, you know yourself, your sexuality and what you like, so just be you man.
Thanks and goodluck (:
-J
Also about my guy, do you think telling him I love him at this point would ruin the relationship? I honestly don't know what I am to him. Since we are long distance, I feel like I can't be his girlfriend and I don't want to ask him. But I also want to know because we are too close to not be anything. That's how I see it. Thank you for running this blog, your first message was wonderful. :)
I mean, telling him that may or may not ruin the relationship, but I think that you should do it. Don’t hold anything back, because you never know what will happen if you let your feelings out. If you guys are as close as you say you are, then he should still accept you and understand your feelings, even though he doesn’t feel the same way. Just don’t keep things like that to yourself because you never want to be the “what if” person in life. You may be scared, and that’s normal, but you also gotta be straight up and tell him like it is (: . P.s. thanks for the kind words :D
- J
Hi, so I'm here again about the the guy I met in November. I should have mentioned this when I messaged you first he's against marriage and stuff but do you think that means love as well? Because I can feel him distancing himself, or losing interest. I'm just not sure if he'll ever want to be in love.
Well here’s the thing, just because someone’s against marriage, doesn’t mean that they’re against love, it’s impossible, unheard of. He honestly might just be scared of commitment, settling down, but not against love. Love and marriage do co exist, but the idea of love and marriage are separate in their own sense.
-J
